Tuesday, March 25, 2008


Are there rules of Love? I mean a decade ago I had some idea. If you saw a Man that you thought was interesting you gave him your number and you waited for the call, you waited for him to ask you out, ask you for sex. But now I can make the call right? I am nothing if not bold. I have asked men out on dates, picnics, concerts. That was a decade ago. Have the rules changed? And do men like women who are BOLD? I just think leaving all that sort stuff in the hands of a Man solely is so one-sided. So if I met a Man that I find interesting do I step to him? Take his number? Call and connect? You bet!

I am not with this whole notion of rationing love. If I want to talk to you, I am calling. If I am thinking of you I am texting. If I want to send you a sexy note, I am doing that. The rules are for less confident Sisters who walk in fear. Now I am not suggesting casting my pearls before swine. But there is something to be said for discriminating taste and once you jump that hurdle can you move at your own pace? YES! Truth be told, I am not interested in playing at Love. I am however interested in authenticity and honesty and the rules for that are universal: come as you are, act with integrity, have a generous spirit and speak truth to power. Those are the rules...the only rules. All that other stuff is manipulation and dishonesty. And quite frankly exhausting.

So if I am crushing on you...you'll know it, because I will be stepping to you with my boldness and sexual energy. There are no rules...except the ones that I make or better still the ones WE make.

The Love List 88-89
  • 88. Checks on me throughout the day to say hello and that I am thinking of you.
  • 89. picks up my favorite soy ice cream without me asking.


Jennifer said...

Yes! A woman who knows who she is can show show it with tenderness, passion and vitality. I'm so with you on this.
Bill Withers said it best, "Sweet and tender things are so much nicer than silly games..."

Lovebabz said...

Hey Jennifer!
Girl, you and Bill Withers are righ on! I am not playing at anything especially not Love. I am however coming boldly and tenderly. And I like it better!

Ms Smack said...

I really really like your love lists...

Lovebabz said...

Hey Miss Smack,

I love it too, it has been a true excercise in discerning what I want and need in the next lover/partner/husband.

Monique said...

I'm with you on this too.

I'm currently crushing on a guy that I think is a little socially inept. I feel like if I don't make a move, nothing is going to happen.

Don said...

Love this post. And I agree, there are no rules when it comes to love. So it's in everyone's best interest to love/live as if this is your last day.

Anyone who thinks different, I tell them to prove it.

The Artist In Me said...

Hi Love:
I have always been bad at determining whether those actions are appropriate or not. In the end, I think I end up doing what I want to do, whether it is playing by someone elses rules or not.

Be blessed!

dejanae said...

dont see the use in playing games

nice post per usual

Lovebabz said...

Hello Monique--yes go for it! Nothing ventured nothing gained!

Don, I think you are right and I am going use that--ask anybody...prove it! Prove me wrong!

Lovebabz said...

Hell Sister-Artist in Me,
doing what you want to do is the best road to take. Sitting and waiting is not always best...you know your own mind and heart!

Playing games is exhausting and a pure waste of time. And thanks for the compliment!

Xavier Pierre Jr. said...

Ya know, you really touched me today. Thanks God the ropes that bound us have been cut. In it's place, and invisible thread ties us to each other and all those like us. Strength in numbers right?

Peace and LOVE,

Ali’s Zay (http://LoversA.blogpot.com)

Lovebabz said...

Xavier, we must sit and talk and share a drink or two. I think we have stories to share. I do so appreciate your sensitve spirit and commitment to love without boundaries!

Absolutely strength in numbers!

KELSO'S NUTS said...

Fail 88. I'm the worst about phone calls.

Clear 89. I'd find out pretty quickly what your favorite treats are and would generally keep the larder stocked with them.