LEAD OUT LOUD...

I needed some inspiration today...more than the usual dose I require each day to press on.  I thought this was just the thing I needed.

GOODBYE BLOGGING...FOR AWHILE...A GOOD LONG WHILE

I am giving up this blog for a while. A long good while. I need to get out into the world and talk to people face to face. I need to get out and walk around, explore. I need to leave the safety and comfort of my computer and make love.

I've been at this for a long time now and I love it. But I need to strengthen my other writing skills. I need to immerse myself in cooking, reading for pleasure and continue learning the tango and drinking wine and entertaining friends and making love.

This Summer was beautiful. I feel in love and I loved the way I felt. I reconnected with a old friend and we made passionate explosive love. We fell out. I misunderstood him and he tried to learn who I am now. I loved the way I felt being in love. I need to get out and fall in love some more.

I am leaving this blog and Raw Dawg Buffalo Radio. I want to put more effort into LoveTalk, my blogtalk radio show. I want to put more energy into PChats my erotic writing blog. I am studying in The School of Spirituality and I love it and feel at home and at peace talking about the Divine with other seekers on the path to enlightenment.

I will be back to blogging. But right now I need to live what I blog. I have to become love and live love. I need to stop talking about love at this level and really get out from behind my computer and live love. I plan on revisiting my archives. I want to reread my blogging history and reconnect with what I wrote from the beginning.

I've got new ventures to launch and love to make. I'll be back.

TO ALL THINGS A SEASON...

I am leaving. I am not sure I will be back. I think I will. It is my goal and intention to come back. I am not sure. I need a break. I need something more than all these words suffocating me. I hurt. I ache.

I have been standing in my loneliness for so long that I can't remember what it is to not feel lonely. I have be handling it. Pressing on and holding it down for a very long time. I am without question, strong and resilient. I am nothing if not resilient. Sojourner incarnate.

My life can sometimes get the better of me...right now it is. I am surrendering to what is. I have got to sit and rest and be quiet and not talk. I am weakened. This is the hardest truth to tell. My compass is broken. I am unsure in my steps.

I can't stop crying. I can't stop crying over stupid shit, major shit, SHIT. I don't know who can hold me, who can hold me up. I am not so sure anyone can. I am not so sure of too much.

What little I know is that Love lives in me. I do not doubt the depth and wealth of love in me.

So I am closing the house (blog) for the rest of the summer and perhaps the crispness of the coming Fall will stir me, move me, inspire me. And I may return with new vigor and a light heart, open and welcoming once again.

I turn my attention inward to my heart and soul. To listen for the divine. To fill my mind with healing words. To pray, contemplate, and discern what to do next.

To everything
There is a season
And a time for every purpose,
under heaven
Ecclesiastes