Saturday, August 25, 2007

MY WEIGHT LOSS GOALS: NOTHING IS WRITTEN IN STONE...THANK GOD

I have a blog over at Sparkpeople and the Black Moms Club (click links on my blog) I post about my weight loss journey on the Sparkpeople site and I am talking about the obesity crisis of Black Women at the Black Moms Club. This is such a touchy issue for me that I have wrestled it to the back burner for years and years. Anyway, I have decided to rethink my weight loss goals. In the beginning when I decided to make losing weight a priority I knew it was ambitious and I was up for it. Now with so many other things in my life that need my immediate attention, I have to surrender to the fact that I can't solely focus on weight. I mean I am eating for comfort, I am eating to distract, I am eating to numb. My health is important to me, I just can't focus on it--so I guess it really isn't, right? This is the problem with women in general and Black women specifically. Everything comes before our own health. I know better and yet I just can't muster the strength and commitment to do better. I am smart, well educated and pretty quick on my feet and yet this is a fight I need more help with then I anticipated. Last year I started a Internet weight loss support group for women and I can tell you that I haven't visited it in months--I have gotten emails from the 70 women I recruited but I haven't had the energy to respond. What can I say? So I am rethinking my weight loss goals. I have come to realize that I can and have given my self permission to do that and be OK. How quick I am to beat myself up and and how slow I am to nurture my wounded self. Nothing is written in stone...thank God. I can change my weight loss goals and be OK. I not abandoning them, just changing the intensity of the commitment...for now.

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