An Extraordinary Life Examined. Notes and views on being an EX-Wife, Mother, Felon and Citizen of the world. This is my personal journey of how I am moving forward with grace and tenderness.
Thursday, August 23, 2007
BLUE THURSDAY
If I sit still and really think about what I am up against, I swear I will just jump off a building. I feel as if I am carrying the world on my shoulders and if I stop to ponder the reality of things, it will all come crashing down. Yep, I am feeling blue today. Maybe because I just got my period and the chemical imbalance is manifesting itself in a bad mood. I just want to crawl back into bed and veg for the day. And let the kids just watch mindless TV. I am feeling blue today. I just talked to my estranged husband and he can be such an asshole about well, everything. But mostly about money. He seems to think I should have more than I do--well maybe if I didn't have to buy school clothes, sneakers, shoes, etc and pay a few bills. And whatever else he thinks magically happens. I am feeling blue today. I have to get organized to pack down my house and get ready for the move, which maybe sometime in October. I haven't heard from the Federal Corrections Institution about my report date--the sooner I get in, the sooner I get out. Yep, I am blue today. I am blue today and I have no idea how I am going to shake it. Maybe I will just live with it for today and allow myself some Blue time.
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2 comments:
This too shall pass.
I don't know who said it, but it sure is true!
You are allowed to feel blue. You know by now that not every waking moment consists of rainbows and pink clouds. Take the time you need to feel sad. And who knows, you just may wake up feeling like a million bucks tomorrow!
BB,
I know this shall pass, and your right, I may wake up tomorrow feeling like a million bucks.
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