Friday, August 29, 2008


Originally posted Tuesday, July 10, 2007


I just finished Florence Falk's book "On My Own, The Art of Being A Woman Alone" I was so moved by this book that I wanted to share this passage. It speaks to me on so many levels. I must say that it lights my path and helps me face my future with more courage and a grander sense of purpose. So here is one of my favorite passages from the book:

Aloness is a gift; it can return us to our own self. Instead of avoiding it, we need to accept it whole-heartedly, even though we fear it. To rid ourselves of our fears, we first need to understand their source. As our fears diminish, we have a renewed opportunity to realize a life of our own. Each relationship in our lives is a teaching; a way to learn what we want and need for ourselves and what we are willing to give, or not give, in order to get it. In this sense, aloness is a mirror wherein we may view ourselves more wholly and affirmatively.


Moanerplicity said...

I treasure my aloneness, and always have. I was that weird kid who preferred my own company because there were always something new to discover about ME. Each of us has the potential to be a fascinating being, but we only discover this by discovering our selves, who we are, and what we think.

Some people freak, get depressed, run from one relationship to the next, and do crazy self-defeating things just so they won't be alone.

What is it about their selves that's so undesirable that they run from spending quality time with their thoughts?


You are never freer than you when you spend the time getting to know what's in your heart, what's in the traffic of your mind & in the wilderness of your spirit. For me, that ish is so damn cleansing & informative & necessary.

Snatch JOY!


Anonymous said...

I agree with this on so many levels. We have to be comfortable with being alone, or being by ourselves, loving ourselves, before we can ever commit to loving someone else. When we love ourselves and are able to be ok with being alone, then you are able to bring your true self to a relationship.

NoRegrets said...

Ah, but it's so hard sometimes to be alone and to face all that crap... but yes, it's true.

KELSO'S NUTS said...

NUTMEG: In some ways the greatest gift my parents gave me was raising me as a "latch-key kid." I developed a lot of calm and enjoyment spending time alone while never losing my enthusiasm for socializing and being the center of attention. I still like both.

I also left a long impassioned rant on AJ's site just now in support of her post about blood diamonds. Please assure her that I was not trying to take over her blog. I merely let my many thoughts on the subject (developed while alone!) take over.

Ironically, I had even been thinking about the subject a couple of days ago and made a reference to the issue. It involved an anti-blood diamond movie told from an arm's dealer's perspective to make a point in strong support of Obama! How weird is that?

Rich said...

It took me a long time to truly treasure aloneness when I was single. Now that I'm married, I realize how priceless it really is.

Keli said...

Not sure if I would define this as aloness...but more so reflection...but I get what the author is saying.

I love myself, I don't mind being's being lonely that I am not too fond of.