I know one of my biggest lessons to learn is believing someone when they show and tell me who they are. You know when a man says he is not interested in a serious relationship, but still wants to kick it with you and you want a serious relationship. So you then believe that perhaps you are the ONE that could change his disposition. Change his mind. Change him. Or you hang out with a man you really don't like but you do because you have nothing else going on and the thought of being alone is so frightening that your own company is unacceptable.
I have decided to accept folks as they come into my life. But at the same time I also have to be more discerning and truthful in who I choose to spend my precious time with. What I hear from a Man has to also be in tuned to what I see in the Man. He can't say on thing and do another. Well he could, but then I have to be truthful and honest and courageous enough to say this is not what I want and keep it moving. To do anything else is saying I do not believe my soul mate is out there, so therefore I am going to settle for what's in my face. So therein lies the rub, knowing in my heart and soul that someone is not right for ME. No matter how much I like them, they are saying with their actions I AM NOT THE ONE! So why am I trying to make myself more available to someone who has already said in action and deeds his feelings? Because I am not being truthful, or honest with what I know. I want what I know not to be truth and if I just hang in and keep telling myself that what I feel, and see and hear is not what I see, feel and hear then happiness will surely be mine. Somehow I will get what I want. Which is so not true.
I was on the phone the other day with a friend, we were talking relationships and encounters of all sorts. And He said women don't listen, they hear what they want to hear, so I use what they say against them, kick it a few times and then off to the next. Oh he is completely honest with them. He tells them straight out that he has no time for a serious affair. Women don't listen. I don't listen.
I heard it loud and clear and it was quite chilling. He was talking to my soul and the world shifted. I needed to hear it. I believe he has been saying it all along, I just didn't hear it because of who I am to him. How silly and foolish of me. Because really I am nothing to him.
When someone tells you who they are...believe them. This is my lesson and I have learned it.