I have observed in my own life how much pain and suffering is easily doled out and received. And yet love is often treated like a bad disease. I have noticed in my own life how quick I am to shower myself with scorn and self-loathing. While speaking lovingly seems like a foreign concept.
It is easy to harm, hurt or kill. But it is difficult to love freely and without abandon and fear. Everyone, and I do mean everyone, is guarded and careful and fearful and insecure. No one wants to reach out for another unless they are sure; they are absolutely sure of their feelings. They are absolutely sure that the one they believe they love will not hurt, harm or kill them. But we are never really sure are we. I think Love is about walking on faith. I extend my heart and hand to another. Is there an expectation that the other will do the same? That is the hope.
I am beginning to look at the love in my life right now. Who do I love really? And how do I know? and how do they know? Am I telling and showing all those that I love that I love them? That I love them. How do I know if I am loved? What tells me so? What is my measure? What is my standard?
I am going to explore this for a bit. Because you cannot seek Love if you have no knowledge of love. I want to clearly define what love is for me. For me, I want to define what love is. I don't want to guess or adopt flowery language. I want to define it from my gut and heart and mind and soul and body. I want to walk on faith. Be authentic in my loveships. And sing to the heavens my own love songs.
I know what it is like to be harmed, hurt and threatened to be killed. I know what it's like to harm, hurt and almost kill. I want to know what it is like to fully understand and accept what it means to be loved. Loved as I am in this body, in this mind, in this moment.