I am learning that time really has no real relevance to love. As I am fond of saying and repeating from the A Course in Miracles LOVE waits on Welcome...Not on TIME. It means that you can welcome love into your life and heart at any given moment. Not solely when it's convenient for you. The heart is an a amazing thing, it knows how to beat on its own. It does not need us to sit and clock its beats. Love is like that too. If we allow love to set in, it too will thrive.
I am in love with someone who is so conscious of time and planning that I am ready to walk away. When someone is constantly throwing time around what they are really saying is the love that you have to give them in this moment is not what their time allows for. And you have to recognize if someone has real time for love. If they do not and you are not honest then you start the convincing cycle. The place where you do your hardest to make them see that you are worth their time if they would take the time to see you. I have long since decided to give up the convincing mode and I am not going back. You see I am not interested in the potential for love.
I am interested in the now-ness of love. The readiness of love. This is where it gets tricky for people. They think that if they hang in with someone...wait someone out, be accommodating that the love they want will happen. No. This is just holding time....spending time with no real sense of love being showered on you. I am not interested in this either. Using time as barrier against getting the love we all say we want is a cowards way of not living with a full heart. You can not time stamp love. If we could, we all would schedule falling in love at the most opportune time. When we are at our best and our lives our happy and harmonious. But our whispers and prayers for GOD to send someone our way is always in the most desperate of hours....when loneliness is overwhelming and standing alone is painful to the touch. I have been there.
This falling in love time for me is very illuminating. I am grateful for its lessons thus far. I am grateful that I have the ability to live all that I speak. That means not accepting anything less than what I want for my heart and soul. Total, full, deep and abiding love.
I am not afraid to let go of something seemingly good and beautiful when in my heart it does not bring me the love I want, need and deserve.
The questions remain: WHO ARE YOU AND WHAT DO YOU WANT?