What do I want? Is that the question? Should I reexamine what I want? There is a steadiness I crave that I want along side the adventure. Does that make sense? Here's another question... Am I being realistic? And am I asking for too much? Why the fuck am I even questioning asking for too much? Ahhh, the invasive unworthiness devil rears its ugly head. And when I say asking for too much, this spans across my life and all the dreams of who I want to be moving forward.
Perhaps I should be glad to have the wherewithal to reexamine the questions I answered long ago. Things have changed. I am different than say even last year. Reexamining the questions of who am I and what do I want has become my touch stone and ongoing dialogue of asking and seeking answers; my check in point. I am coming to understand that this is where I get to defeat the whispers of unworthiness. This is where I stay in emotional shape. By simply asking what do I want? And by asking, I am allowing the truth to emerge. I am all about the truth in whatever that may be or turns into or shows up as.
I have fully embraced the need for clarity, especially in matters of my heart. I am not guessing or supposing anything. I am clear. In that clarity, unworthiness can show up and undue the desires if I am not paying attention to my own heart and mind. Stillness and the need for deliberated practiced stillness restores me back to standing in my truth. I am worthy of every damn thing I want. I am worthy of every long held wish, dream, desire, and fantasy. For me, the key is holding onto this knowledge and allowing it to be nurtured in my soul. Yes. I am worthy with every breath I take.
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2 comments:
I am also searching for clarity about "what do I want?," and finding it incredibly challenging. Not "what do other people want for me?"; not "what do I think I'm supposed to want?"; but what do I really, truly want? That raises a deeper question: who am I? These are quests of a lifetime. May we find what we need, Babz.
Lately it seems that a great number of us are being prodded to do, think and act upon that which we are called to do. The one thing I know is that there's greatness in us, when the time and action moves us, we'll be successful ;-)
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