Sunday, September 4, 2011

Wandering The Day...and other Sunday Thoughts

So it's Sunday evening, one of my favorite days.  I always take a nap in the early part of the day, after Church and after lunch.  I usually get in a really good dream of how I want my life to be.  There is always jazz on Sunday here.  I love jazz and I love gospel jazz or Jazz Gospel music.  I love jazz.  So I crank on the Bose and find my favorite satellite radio station and Coltrane, or Parker, or some other sublime artist streams through my house.  This is how I love to spend my Sunday, no rushing, no plans, no stress.

And in deed I do miss him.  I miss his Sunday meandering.  I miss his looking forward to football.  I miss his interaction with my kids.  I miss our witty banter. I miss knowing he is in the house.

I can feel the loneliness slowly creeping in.  I can feel myself retreating from the noise of the world.  I can feel myself walking down that path again.  I feel so brave when I recognize depression coming.  I absolutely believe I can head it off at the pass.  I have learned to quickly remind myself that I am powerful beyond measure and that God is priming me for my greatness.  I like this thinking. it makes me smile big and full.  I am laughing because I believe it!  So ha ha ha to you depression (devil).

I displayed my crafts in my living room.  I never display or share anything I make.  But I decided I love it and I want to share it.  I think this is good vibrations....sending out good energy and good energy coming in!

The day is coming to a close.  Time to round up my kids and call them in and send their friends on their way.  Perhaps we'll watch a movie or a TV show.  I wish we had dessert, but perhaps freezie pops will do.

I love the ebb and flow of Sundays. I feel so in the rhythm of the moment.  Sadness and loneliness aside, I am enjoying the day into evening into night.


BigmacInPittsburgh said...

You speak so honest which is the path to your happiness.

Lovebabz said...

Hello BigmacInPittsburgh,
I ought to be more honest if truth be told. I am by nature a happy person. It's the loneliness that is hard to take.