FIRST THE TEST...THEN THE LESSON

I can feel the wolves at the door.  I can feel the magnitude of my life weighing unduly heavy.  It is these moments where I must summon all my faith.  Be still and listen for God's directive.  I am not afraid...  I can see how I can be afraid.  There is so much at stake.  I don't have the luxury of whining abut how tough it is.  It is what it is. I have to keep my head straight.  I have children who depend on me to provide.  I depend on me.  Opting out is not an option.

First comes the test...then the lesson.  This is how I believe God works sometimes. 

So here I am standing in the same place of uncertainty, lack and self-pity.  The big difference is I am not accepting any of it.  I am not allowing any of the negative vibes to take hold in my spirit. I am refusing to feel sad, hopeless and depressed.  All is not lost.  It may feel like it, but then again feelings can be illusion.  THIS IS MY TEST: What will I do in the face of enormous challenges? 

There are good things just up ahead and that's the direction I am going. THAT'S THE LESSON! Move in the direction of the blessings. Forward.

Eat That Frog! by Brian Tracy

Just thought I could use some more motivation from a different source today :)

MOVE SWEAT MOVE SWEAT MOVE

Movement and sweating is critical to change.  You gotta move the butt to clear the mind.  You gotta sweat to flush the toxins out of your body. You can de-clutter your living space all you want, but if your mind is cluttered then you've done very little by way of change.

I am feeling good these days.  I have been active everyday since I took up this 100 Days Challenge (sure you can say 100 day challenge) Anyway, I want to be strong and svelte.  I want to get rid of my pillow....code for: that big tummy that I spend a ridiculous amount of money trying to hide with big shirts, tunics and caftans.  I want to glide in my heels.  I want to wear whatever I want to wear. I want to be around to see my kids live their lives.

So I am moving my butt EVERYDAY!  I have DVDs and weights and good sneakers and wii and access to parks.  I am committed to moving everyday just as I am committed to brushing my teeth.  It is that serious.  The change for me is a top to bottom all over change.  I want a different outcome. 

Move sweat move sweat move.  That's the mantra.  That's where I pick up the charge and run with it.

Join me in the 100 days challenge. Every day start with a cleansing breath as prayer, say a prayer if it moves you. Eat mindfully. Enjoy your own company. Love those in your circle and tell them. Write to someone. Tell a joke. Look for the best in everyone. Be kind. Start and keep a gratitude journal---each day write down at least 3 things you are grateful for that day. Enjoy a glass of water---at least 8 times a day. Take a walk around your neighborhood, or downtown. Get to bed early, try to give yourself 8 hours of good sleep. and smile. Let me know if your in. Let me know how you are doing. Feel free to add and share your own ways to live more fully.

COME AS YOU ARE....

You have only one sacred duty:
     to make your spirit available to others.
You do this by sharing what you already are
      in this and every moment.
If you are loving, you share your loving.
If you are suffering, you share your suffering.
If you are healing, you share your healing.

Why waste precious energy arguing with God about
       what it is that is yours to share right now,
        worrying how your broken bit could be of
        use.

Trust that however unlikely it may seem,
        without your piece,
         the universe would be incomplete.

***Carol Orsborn, Nothing Left Unsaid
Words to Help You and Your Loved Ones through the Hardest Times

100 DAYS CHALLENGE: FAITH. GOD. LOVE SUPREME.

Let the preaching begin:  You gotta have faith that something bigger, grander and supreme is walking on this journey of change with you.  Call it whatever you like, I happen to like GOD, Jesus Christ, The I AM.  You must find a way to communicate with your inner self and the creator of the universe.  I happen to like prayer, but you can choose whatever methods that work for you... meditation, chanting, burning sage, drawing, or walking through the park. I also like to go to Church.  I have found that this journey is not one to be solely taken in solitude, that meeting up with a community of believers is one of the best blessings in life.  To sit in fellowship with people who share your journey is divine. 

We are not meant to be solitary creatures.  We are meant to be connected to one another in love as well as in struggle. We are not solely just people in our skins, but also spiritual beings that exists beyond the mere physical. To know and understand that, already sets you upon a path of change.  I believe that our physical selves house our spirit, our souls and all our thoughts.  That if the body dies and it will, the spirit journeys on. I think life is infinite. Never ending, always moving, always changing.

All change has to happen from a place of willingness, rooted in love.  Love of self, family,community and country. It is not enough to want anything, let alone change.  Want is only a small part of it. What are you willing to do, everyday to make change in your life?  I think most people think that change is some sweeping larger than life ordeal...and often it is.  But it's in the seemingly small steps we take, that becomes the catalyst for the life changing we want and often times NEED.  Love is discipline expressed everyday no matter what the circumstances of the excuse.  If you are in love with yourself then you will work all the more harder for the changes you need to make.  OK sometimes.  It takes getting the right rhythm of motivation.  It requires your mind to be ready to be focused and it also requires a letting go to a power...a supreme being that is grander, larger than yourself.

Full circle. We need each other clinging to humanity to survive.  We need kind words and actions on our behalf.  We need love unconditional and without harsh judgements. I need you and you need me.  Change is not solitary and neither is God.

Keep the faith and if you have none, get some. Believe that you are not alone. Know that your prayers are answered. Begin with a simple prayer: Breathe in. Breathe Out.

100 DAYS CHALLENGE: THE PLAN

Everyday for the next 31 days I will be blogging my life and the real changes I am making on this 100 Days Challenge.

Anything you want to do seriously has to be committed to paper.  It's not good enough to hold it in your heart and head.  You have to actually commit to putting your goals and action steps on paper.  It is about accountability, otherwise you're just talking shit.  I know, I have been talking shit for a long long time.

It's not enough to announce to all who will listen what your intentions are.  The road to hell is paved with all the best intentions...  So you have to write it down in language you can relate to.  It doesn't have to be fancy, or in some leather bound journal...unless that's your thing.  I love fancy paper, journals and notebooks. I am always on the look out for interesting and one of kind pretty paper.  Anyway, whatever your fancy, be sure to write down what you are going to do.

Write in a language that makes sense to you.  This is your plan and no one has to see it or know about it unless you share.  I am done sharing, except here.  I find that talking to people about what you want to do can be annoying and sets you up for unwanted competition, unwanted opinions and unwanted company. Unless of course you want competition, opinions and company.  There is value in accountability, so think about that and perhaps tap one friend who won't judge you or hamper your progress and won't baby you and accept your mess either.  And for heaven's sake stay away form the "know-it-alls" Those folks who just know everything about everything including your health concerns, your dietary needs and your problems. Be gentle with those souls, they believe they are helping.

Check your plan everyday.  Make notes about how you are feeling. Track what you eat if you want.  But most of us have done that before and although it can be quite illuminating, I know you know where your dietary pitfalls are.

Most importantly, be kind to yourself.  Shush the negative talk. Do your best.  Make the effort and keep at it.

Join me in the 100 days challenge. Every day start with a cleansing breath as prayer, say a prayer if it moves you. Eat mindfully. Enjoy your own company. Love those in your circle and tell them. Write to someone. Tell a joke. Look for the best in everyone. Be kind. Start and keep a gratitude journal---each day write down at least 3 things you are grateful for that day. Enjoy a glass of water---at least 8 times a day. Take a walk around your neighborhood, or downtown. Get to bed early, try to give yourself 8 hours of good sleep. and smile. Let me know if your in. Let me know how you are doing. I will post a little something at least twice a week on the challenge. Feel free to add and share your own ways to live more fully.

100 DAYS CHALLENGE: IT BEGINS...

Everyday for the next 31 days I will be blogging my life and the real changes I am making on this 100 Days Challenge.

I am starting my 100 Days Challenge with reconnecting with my bedroom.  The place where I sleep and dream and make love.  Gee, how can that be true when there are clothes drapped over the chair and magazines on the floor, books in the bed.  Nothing about my room makes me want to sleep, dream or make love!  So I am taking it back!  I am cleaning the room, picking up the mess and putting things away. Last Summer Mr. Love painted it a beauitiful soft teal color and I bought new linens (tossed all the linens that we bought during the marriage).  I had a vision for my room.  A place of solace, and inspritation.  A sacred space that was a no-kid zone.  I have to recapture that vision.  I am recapturing that vision.

I can no longer allow the tired excuses to drip from my lips like honey.  If I want a different outcome I have to do things differently.  It starts with picking up my room and caring about my things.  It is about creating the sacred space I so desperately desire.  There are no magical fairies that will come in and make my bed, do my laundry and tidy up.  Last I heard gnomes are working for Travelocity.  So its all on me to create and maintain my bedroom as a sacred space.

Who am I and what do I want?

Join me in the 100 days challenge. Every day start with a cleansing breath as prayer, say a prayer if it moves you. Eat mindfully. Enjoy your own company. Love those in your circle and tell them. Write to someone. Tell a joke. Look for the best in everyone. Be kind. Start and keep a gratitude journal---each day write down at least 3 things you are grateful for that day. Enjoy a glass of water---at least 8 times a day. Take a walk around your neighborhood, or downtown. Get to bed early, try to give yourself 8 hours of good sleep. and smile. Let me know if your in. Let me know how you are doing. I will post a little something at least twice a week on the challenge. Feel free to add and share your own ways to live more fully.