The challenge is always for me not to be so focused on the struggle that I miss the view. That life is unfolding no matter what is happening both chaotic and serene. God waits for me to come and seek him. To listen. To pray. To meet God in silence. In that silence I am reminded that looking inward is not just closing one's eyes, but noticing the inner movement of God as I admire the roses... and the lilies of the field. I have come to realize that closing my eyes isn't what's always needed. Sometimes it's taking a deep breath on a busy street corner and noticing Christ in all that walk past me. There is so much beauty moving in the world. I see the beauty of people and places that I often miss if I am not deliberately seeking to notice GOD.
God shows up more in my laughter. God shows up happy when I am rejoicing in the ordinary and mundane. God shows up as I show up in whatever state of mind I am in... God meets me there. And lately I've grown tired of showing up for GOD sad, destructive, defeated, angry, hurt, mean, desperate and guilty and ashamed. I am leaving the bulk of that mess on the side of the road... too heavy to carry any further. In laying down those burdens. I am actively seeking joyous, spirited, abundant interactions with GOD. The inner movements call me to be grateful for the breath I take. I've squandered too many breaths on meaningless foolishness that didn't serve me or God. I am choosing Joy. It suits me. Happiness and love and laughter are at my core and that is where I want to dwell.
Even my prayers will reflect my joy... not begging and desperate and fevered. Prayers of gratitude for undeserved grace. Prayers for the world, my circle of friends and family and for strangers.
I am entering into my era of love and laughter. Rejoicing!
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2 comments:
...may this Lenten season be THE Lenten season that brings you the best and most sacred of your desires...
Thank you Big Mark 243. You always lift me with the kindest words.
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