This year Zora, is an answer year. The last half dozen years were years that asked questions...begged questions...drowned me in questions.... Why Why Why? So many fucking questions, some I thought I laid to rest. Some are new and still some are old masquerading as new questions. Maybe the turning of the new year is wrestling them back up. Maybe there is unfinished business in my soul. Maybe I didn't cut the head off the dragons and they are back with a vengeance.
...can I cum over and crawl in bed with you one last time?
And so he did. And so we did. And just as easily as he slipped in, he slipped out. Gone before dawn as if we were young lovers afraid to get caught by our parents. My heart was breaking and I didn't even know it.. I was so caught up in the BEST FUCKING SEX EVER. Even now as I think about it I feel hot...faint even. It has always been amazing with us. But this time... this last time, felt like I stood in heaven and earth at the same time. There was none of my usual moaning and screaming. There was no sound...as if the sound barrier was broken just as I climaxed. It was a kind of high I never had before. Every nerve ending in my body was ablaze. I knew I was changing with each touch, with each thrust, with each stroke, lick, kiss, caress. I was owned in a way that was so foreign and so righteous. He owned me. It is a soul-tie that will be hard to break.I called his name, i swore myself to him. The passion consumed me like a house on fire.... yes that corny and that profound.
This year Zora, is an answer year. I am saying good bye to him. Forever. Not like goodbye forever before. This is an answer year. The answer is no. Good bye. You see once we climb out of bed and into the day, who we are becomes unrecognizable. So, Zora this is a year for answers. And the answer is Goodbye.
This year Zora, is an answer year. I am answering my life. Everyday I am going to answer my life.