At some point you have to say enough already. You have to know your pain threshold. We are not for each other. Not because we didn't try, but because we tried too much. Forcing a loveship that should have only been a summer fling last year. Here I am, wanting you to leave, move out, break up, break off, leave. This begins the season of mean when breaking up is hard to do. I wish you well. I wish you all the best. I wish you love.
I wish you would leave and take a slow boat to China and not call me, or send me a post card, or even whisper my name. It is quite startling when you realize you've been taken advantage of. When you have given more than you ever received. And you did not give so much because you wanted to receive anything at all. But the taking was so consistent and relentless that you just gave out of habit. We all judge people that's how we keep some mess out of our lives. We judge people on various things to help us decide if their being in our lives could be worth the effort. Sometimes we are successful and sometimes we are fooled, tricked and blinded. In my case I was blinded by history and potential. I saw him as he was, and hoped he would become something more.
He hasn't been here for two nights and it's been so peaceful. I like having my home to myself without someone under foot with a critical eye and a disapproving voice. I must say I had a good run with him, but it has lasted too long. The time has come to part company and get on down the road of our respective paths.
I am not unhappy or sad by any of this. I have learned that regret is wasted energy. To be in the company of someone who you know you will not make a life with is wasted energy. I am going in peace. I remain a hopeless romantic, always believing that true love dwells within. Always knowing that what I am seeking is also seeking me. How divine.
This is goodbye Mr. Love... for real, for real! There is nothing left to say except I wish you well, be safe, find joy and take care.