Thursday, January 8, 2015

Hey Universe I'm Ready To Share

Underneath it all is that longing... that want. Everywhere I turn people are falling in love and getting engaged, committing to each other. I want some of that. No, I want a LOT of that. Oh I live a very full life... commitments to community, work, sorority, church, children, friends old and new. And yet there is still room for that one person. Lover/husband/Confidant/Friend/Partner.  There is room. Maybe there isn't and the Universe is waiting for a break in the busyness? Or maybe I haven't done enough to be found? Honestly I don't have the energy to parade and prance. I do well to glam up on the day-to-day hustle and get out the door looking pulled together.

I'm calling the one who has worked through his shit... isn't so fucking needy...and can command his own life. This seems an impossible endeavor. All I keep hooking are men who take more than they give... and they have nothing to give! Real talk. Yes, I own some of that, because I was willing to accept the nothing. 

This isn't a whine or a rant. I was standing in my master bedroom... that I just rearranged and I realized I could do with some company... a significant other. Not like the mess I just untangled from... hello... NO! What I am trying to say is that I am willing to own what I want in a partner/lover/husband. I settled, because I didn't believe what I needed and wanted existed.  But as I look around I see glimpses of interesting men who are slightly out of reach for one reason or another. And that gives me hope. I think I am getting closer to my gift. Yes gift. Someone sharing their life with you is a gift. I am a gift too. I am ready to share.

Hey Universe I am ready to share! And by ready I mean I am whole, and open and willing and inviting and unafraid.

Heaven please send to all mankind,
Understanding and peace of mind,
But, if it's not asking too much
Please send me someone to love

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