Monday, December 5, 2011

TIS THE SEASON! ...Resolution Countdown 2012

I am LAZY.  Seriously.  Lazy. And I procrastinate.  I have all these great ideas and then I sit on them.  Sometimes I write them down in lovely journals.  Each time I swear I am going to follow up...follow through...complete...finish.  And what happens NOTHING!

This isn't a beat down post on myself.  This is a confession.  A real truth telling.  This is being naked.  I am LAZY.  I procrastinate.  I am watching my life go by like I am a spectator in the stands.  I have started more projects and finished so few. Weight-loss programs, plans, diets. Organization plans, De-cluttering, eat better, moderation in all things.

I am still afraid.  I am still self doubting.  I cast my vote against myself.  I keep waiting for the right moment.  I want someone else to come and rescue me.  I am waiting for a fairy God-mother.  I need pixie dust.  I live for the fantasy because my real life is shit.  This is where I am living in the realm of fear, self-doubt and cowardliness.  It is exhausting. 

DUH! I know better when I look at it...my life that is.  I realize that I must constantly remind myself of what I want to do and move toward it.  Wallowing gets me nowhere.  I am at the age where my friends and folks I know are dying off. I am 48 and that is close to 50.  I gotta get on my grind and make my life what I want and need it to be.  More joy, love, peace and happiness doesn't happen by wishing.  Action! Doing it! Just Do It! That's got to be the constant drive.

I had way too many epiphanies.  I have accomplished a lot. I know what love is.  I can't afford to forget where I've been.  Tis the Season of miracles and I am the miracle! I am going into 2012 with a jump start attitude of getting it done and it starts today!

So here's my first resolution:
  1. I am done with being lazy and procrastinating. What I need to get done I will get done PRONTO! No more putting off for later, or getting around to it. NOW!


2 comments:

Moanerplicity said...

You know what, Sista Lo? You give that concept of "I am my own worst critic" a whole new meaning!
Methinks you could be justa LIL MO easy on yo-sef. Fo real, yo!

I do like how you ended this harsh self-flogging testimony by promising yourself to do mo betta. When you break it down, all any of us can do is to make an sincere effort to try to DO better!

And you will. I believe you will.


The year 2012 awaits to embrace you w/ multitudinous Blessings!

SJ!

One.

Lovebabz said...

Thanks Lin,
We are indeed our own worst critics!