tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4650845911079200343.post1194257732857606618..comments2023-10-31T04:46:00.311-04:00Comments on Lovebabz: A Life in Transition: The "Closure" Myth.. a bit revisedBabz Rawls Ivyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04059921674059371076noreply@blogger.comBlogger3125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4650845911079200343.post-25809100742137538732011-12-15T22:42:57.915-05:002011-12-15T22:42:57.915-05:00Many years ago, I solved the riddle of "closu...Many years ago, I solved the riddle of "closure." It's a veiled hunger for vindication, and from that day on - I laughed everytime I heard a man or woman utter the words.<br /><br />If you watch somebody seeking closure long enough, you'll find one of two unhealthy emotions as work: (1) A desire to get back in the door by engaging the ex in conversationn or (2) a search for enough info to feel vindicated in the whole affair.<br /><br />I have personally never witnessed a healthy need for "closure." Healthy is the ability to walk away without the other person's permission...Her Sidehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00203876781343228134noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4650845911079200343.post-71163407934621834432011-10-28T22:58:19.162-04:002011-10-28T22:58:19.162-04:00I have always thought of 'closure' as a my...I have always thought of 'closure' as a myth, a construct by which an cottage industry was created out of pixie dust... <br /><br />People need to treat a person who says 'leave me alone' as if they were an open flame... no matter what you must avoid being burned to spare yourself a greater pain than if you remain by its heat...Big Mark 243https://www.blogger.com/profile/10974573439218884164noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4650845911079200343.post-73532456852246000292011-10-28T19:58:15.879-04:002011-10-28T19:58:15.879-04:00I used to say this, especially when my ex was so a...I used to say this, especially when my ex was so angry with me after our divorce. I would say "i need to talk with him...i need closure." Several years down the road he sent me an email saying, "I forgive you." I'm thinking, forgive me, forgive me for what? I don't have to go into details on how this all ended, but will tell you, that i said that he needed to forgive himself. I was fine. I don't need closure. It's over. I was not want you wanted. You left. I left. I have recovered. What i think alot of ex-married people do is mistakenly carry on as if we are beholden to these individuals, when we are not. When i think about all of the mean and malicious things he did, i just shake my head and thank God for the experience and also the freedom. I may be without a significant other at this point in time, but i wouldn't trade this peace, this joy, for any of the last moment of our marriage, thus case closed. Whew! Sorry about the diary entry Sis, lol. I'm good!Mizrepresenthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02992754393960138393noreply@blogger.com